Tips for living in genteel poverty 1
Heh! Who would have thought that going for a sedate walk in the forest with your dog is now OUT? For one thing, the forest (park) is closed off. And new guidelines are being issued all the time. "Carry ID and your dog's passport, keep it on a leash at all times, don't let it sniff other dogs, stare right ahead as you hurry past any dog owner or human"... well the last sentence was just what I read between the lines, but still! Don't they know a strong immune system, acquired through dog walking, fresh air, etc, is our best defence against this bastard virus?
Fortunately I live a bit further out from the centre of town, and so far haven't been picked up by any marauding fine-collectors. But it is a concern.
Meanwhile I'm well prepared for any eventuality, with hand-axes, bazookas and a whole bunch of instant noodles. So today I will share with you how to keep the electricity bills down. It takes a bit of preparation, but fortunately I started weeks ago.
First of all, always carry a rucksack and a little saw or axe when out dog walking. There's lots of firewood lying around, and often fallen branches after storms. Don't thrown away ("recycle") your empty Nespresso sleeves, but keep them and fill them with scrap paper and cardboard, as well as dog hairs. Force as much burnable stuff as possible into the boxes (sleeves).
Then, when the temperature drops, set fire to three Nespresso sleeves and use lots of twigs (which you have ALREADY collected!) to get a fire going. When it's roaring well, add increasingly larger pieces of wood until the whole house is pleasantly toasty and smells good. Important! Don't try to put the whole branch inside the wood burner, but cut it in suitably sized pieces with a saw. Sawing will also keep you warm and healthy during the winter months.
P.S. You will need a wood burner and a certain (low-ish) outdoor temperature for this to work. But it's FREE! Except the Nespresso. But we have to have certain standards. I said genteel poverty, right? Not abject poverty.